As some of you may have seen I have a heart condition called Tetralogy of Fallot. After going through extensive testing November 2011 and a cardiac catheterization in March of 2012 it was determined I would need open heart surgery followed by another catheterization to fix an area going into my right lung to open it up and allow more blood flow into the lung.
The surgery was planned, the date was set. I got things taken care to make sure my children were taken care of. All we had to do was wait for the date to arrive. Sounds simple right....
Well God has decided to throw me a curve ball. Instead of having another surgery, I am having another baby. Yup baby number 9 is currently being formed. I have to admit I have freaked out a lot. I have freaked out at my older 2 kids (glad that understand and love me anyway. ) I have freaked out at God.
I have to be honest and say, at this point I am not sure how I feel about the idea. My emotions go back and forth.
What does my cardiologist think? He supports me and while he wants to watch me, he is not overly concerned. He feels that my heart can handle the pregnancy just fine.
27 September 2012
07 September 2012
Preparing for surgery
In just a few short weeks I will be undergoing my 4th open heart surgery. You can read about my heart condition here and here for a current update. The goal of this surgery is to open up my right pulmonary artery so that I can get more blood flow to my right lung. This will make things easier for me and will protect my left lung from damage. The other thing that they are planning on doing is replacing my pulmonary valve. These valves have a lifespan of 10-15 years. While my valve does look good at this point in time, although it is starting to leak, they do not want me to have to undergo surgery again in a couple years.
How do I feel about this, it is hard to say. I am scared more for leaving my children then for anything else. I do not want them to be worried about me. I will miss them very much.
As far as my life goes I have begun to memorize Philippians 1: 21-26
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. But if I am to live on in the flesh, this will mean fruitful labor for me; and I do not know which to choose. But I am hard-pressed from both directions, having the desire to depart and be with Christ, for that is very much better; yet to remain on in the flesh is more necessary for your sake. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy in the faith,
How do I feel about this, it is hard to say. I am scared more for leaving my children then for anything else. I do not want them to be worried about me. I will miss them very much.
As far as my life goes I have begun to memorize Philippians 1: 21-26
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. But if I am to live on in the flesh, this will mean fruitful labor for me; and I do not know which to choose. But I am hard-pressed from both directions, having the desire to depart and be with Christ, for that is very much better; yet to remain on in the flesh is more necessary for your sake. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy in the faith,
29 August 2012
New school year.....
Well it is a new school year in our home. Unlike many (ok maybe most) homeschool households, this does not mean new school books. Our school years run February to February. Mostly because it is with our tax return that I buy our new school books. Also we tend to just work in a book until it is done, then move on to the next level. Mostly for my sophomore, as she worked very hard this past year and working ahead of the game. Since I do have a bunch of books passed down to her, it works.
This year is a kinda bittersweet year for me. At the end of the year, my oldest will graduate from high school. He really has enough credits, but I want him spending this year review math and working on his paper writing.
So this year I have a senior, sophomore, 7th, 5th, 3rd, 1st and preschooler. I don't do a lot of preschool stuff, but they always seem to want to do school like the older ones, so they get a cheap all in one book from Wal-Mart or such and do that.
Another switch in our school year is change I am thankful for, my husbands hours at work have changed and he will be at work in the day. This will help me because we enjoyed spending time with Daddy in the morning and school would often get pushed back and then Mom would get too busy and we would end up going off doing other things.
This year is a kinda bittersweet year for me. At the end of the year, my oldest will graduate from high school. He really has enough credits, but I want him spending this year review math and working on his paper writing.
So this year I have a senior, sophomore, 7th, 5th, 3rd, 1st and preschooler. I don't do a lot of preschool stuff, but they always seem to want to do school like the older ones, so they get a cheap all in one book from Wal-Mart or such and do that.
Another switch in our school year is change I am thankful for, my husbands hours at work have changed and he will be at work in the day. This will help me because we enjoyed spending time with Daddy in the morning and school would often get pushed back and then Mom would get too busy and we would end up going off doing other things.
21 August 2012
college for me
As each semester comes I find that I am struggling more and more with my work. Right now I am taking 3 classes, all 3 I have failed already once and am close to failing one of them a second time. This has me upset, cause I really really wanted to do better.
I am thankful though that a wonderful young lady from my church came over and spent several hours helping me with my homework. She would have stayed even longer, but it was so late and I wanted to make sure she got home safe. She is planning on coming back and helping.
I have a lot of wonderful young people in my life. I have a young friend that is currently sitting across the table from me working on her own homework. It is kinda nice to have a study buddy. Maybe I will get more work done this way.
I am thankful though that a wonderful young lady from my church came over and spent several hours helping me with my homework. She would have stayed even longer, but it was so late and I wanted to make sure she got home safe. She is planning on coming back and helping.
I have a lot of wonderful young people in my life. I have a young friend that is currently sitting across the table from me working on her own homework. It is kinda nice to have a study buddy. Maybe I will get more work done this way.
18 August 2012
Sharing parts of my past with the teens in my life
Like most families I think there are parts of our past that we have shared with our kids and parts we never have.
One thing that had never really ever come up was about my dating in high school. The other day we had a friend over (she is friends with several of my kids) and I was talking with them, which is something we do often. They all were surprised to find out that I had had several boyfriends in high school. It became a big giggle fest, but in it I was able to share what I had learned and why I have encouraged my girls the way that I have. I think they understood a little why my point of view is what it was.
Unlike these teens in my life now, I was not choosing to live for God. I had come to know Christ as my savior at a young age, but due to pain that I had experienced I had tried to walk away from God. I was living kinda as the world says a teen should live.
I didn't do drugs, I did get drunk once. I had a job that I worked at 5 days a week. I didn't like school, but I wasn't a trouble maker either. We talked about that too.
It was great being able to share this with them and encourage them to continue to look to God.
One thing that had never really ever come up was about my dating in high school. The other day we had a friend over (she is friends with several of my kids) and I was talking with them, which is something we do often. They all were surprised to find out that I had had several boyfriends in high school. It became a big giggle fest, but in it I was able to share what I had learned and why I have encouraged my girls the way that I have. I think they understood a little why my point of view is what it was.
Unlike these teens in my life now, I was not choosing to live for God. I had come to know Christ as my savior at a young age, but due to pain that I had experienced I had tried to walk away from God. I was living kinda as the world says a teen should live.
I didn't do drugs, I did get drunk once. I had a job that I worked at 5 days a week. I didn't like school, but I wasn't a trouble maker either. We talked about that too.
It was great being able to share this with them and encourage them to continue to look to God.
17 August 2012
simply a mom
Several years ago I picked this as my user name for many websites. There was a good reason for this. On more then one occasion I have been told "Wow, you must be some super mom." Or some sort of variety of that phrase.
There are days though that I struggle with even feeling like an ok mom. The past month I have struggled with feeling more like a failure then a good mom. I am not sure how exactly to get out of this feeling. I know that I will continue to press on and cling to God.
This world will not drag me down. On the strength of God I will overcome.
Philippians 4:8
Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.
There are days though that I struggle with even feeling like an ok mom. The past month I have struggled with feeling more like a failure then a good mom. I am not sure how exactly to get out of this feeling. I know that I will continue to press on and cling to God.
This world will not drag me down. On the strength of God I will overcome.
Philippians 4:8
Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.
25 July 2012
Yes, I have teens..... and I love it!
My oldest 2 are teenagers and my 3rd child is just about there as she is 12. I will proclaim loudly, I love my teens and I like pretty much most of their friends.
The other day I was talking with F, my 15 (almost 16) year old and 2 of her friends. We sat around the kitchen table, ok well we all sat, or stood in the kitchen and talked. We talked about everything God, school, church and yes... boys.
I often wonder what I did to be so blessed as to be able to sit and talk with my teens the way I do. We have had open talks and I have chosen to talk to the kids about just about anything from a young age, even if I didn't think that they were ready for it, though still trying to protect them from too much information. I have also made time to play with them the things that they enjoy.
I know that being open and honest with our kids is not a promise to a good relationship with them, but I do believe that it has helped.
The other day I was talking with F, my 15 (almost 16) year old and 2 of her friends. We sat around the kitchen table, ok well we all sat, or stood in the kitchen and talked. We talked about everything God, school, church and yes... boys.
I often wonder what I did to be so blessed as to be able to sit and talk with my teens the way I do. We have had open talks and I have chosen to talk to the kids about just about anything from a young age, even if I didn't think that they were ready for it, though still trying to protect them from too much information. I have also made time to play with them the things that they enjoy.
I know that being open and honest with our kids is not a promise to a good relationship with them, but I do believe that it has helped.
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